Active: What It Means in MSM Terms

What Does “Active” Mean in MSM Terminology?

If you have come across the word “active” on an app profile, heard it in a sauna, or been asked about it at a sexual health clinic, it simply means the insertive partner during anal sex — the person who penetrates. In modern UK MSM culture, the more common term for this role is “top,” but “active” means the same thing.

The terminology has a long history. “Active” and “passive” were the standard clinical and sexological terms used in English-language research for much of the twentieth century, including the era of the Kinsey Reports. They also map directly onto the Latin-American terms activo and pasivo, which remain widely used in Spanish-speaking MSM communities. Over recent decades, “top” and “bottom” have become the dominant vernacular among English-speaking MSM, particularly in the UK, while “active” and “passive” now tend to appear more often in older generational usage, on app profiles catering to international users, or within certain fetish and BDSM subcultures — where “active” can carry additional connotations around power dynamics beyond the purely penetrative role.

The important thing to understand is that these words describe a preferred sexual role during a specific act. They do not describe your personality, your relationship role, your masculinity, or your identity as a whole.

Active, Passive, Versatile, Side — The Full Spectrum

One of the most common misunderstandings for newcomers is that positioning is an either/or choice. In practice, it is a spectrum with several recognised points along it.

Active (top) describes the insertive partner in anal intercourse — the person who penetrates. Passive (bottom) describes the receptive partner — the person who is penetrated. These are the two anchor points, but most MSM do not sit rigidly at one end.

Versatile (vers) describes someone comfortable in both roles. Within this, many men lean one way: a “versatile top” mostly penetrates but is open to receiving, while a “versatile bottom” mostly receives but is open to penetrating. Research consistently shows that versatility is one of the most common self-identifications among MSM, and many men’s preferences shift over time as they gain experience, confidence, or encounter different partners.

Side describes a man who does not engage in anal intercourse at all, preferring oral sex, mutual masturbation, frottage, kissing, and other forms of intimacy. The term emerged organically in online MSM communities during the 1990s and was later formalised and popularised in a clinical context by the American sex therapist Dr Joe Kort. Grindr introduced “side” as a profile option in November 2021, giving the preference mainstream visibility on dating platforms. Being a side is a legitimate, stable preference — not a phase, not avoidance, and not a lesser form of sex.

Does Being “Active” Make You the Masculine One?

In a word: no. One of the most persistent myths in MSM culture is that the active or top partner is inherently “the man” in a sexual encounter, while the passive or bottom partner is somehow playing “the woman.” This is a projection of heteronormative gender roles onto same-sex dynamics, and it does not reflect reality.

Studies examining the relationship between perceived masculinity and sexual positioning have found no reliable correlation between a man’s physical appearance, build, or demeanour and his actual role preference. As the UK resource MEN R US puts it plainly: “There are so-called masculine-looking guys that roll over as soon as you wave your dick in their direction and passive-looking guys that will fuck you into the floor.” The stereotype persists in part because of cultural inertia and in part because of its reinforcement in pornography, but it has no basis in evidence.

This myth does real harm. “Bottom shaming” — the belittling of men who prefer the receptive role — remains common in MSM spaces and can discourage men from being honest about what they enjoy. In a sauna or any sexual setting, the only thing that matters is mutual desire and clear, ongoing consent.

Why Your Positioning Preference Matters for Your Sexual Health

Your role preference is not just a matter of pleasure — it directly affects your risk profile for HIV and other STIs, and it determines which screening tests you need.

The receptive (passive/bottom) partner has a higher per-act risk of HIV acquisition during condomless anal sex. This is because the rectal lining is thinner and more susceptible to micro-tears, which can allow the virus greater access to the bloodstream. However, the insertive (active/top) partner is not at zero risk. HIV can enter through the urethra, and other STIs — including gonorrhoea, chlamydia, syphilis, and HPV — transmit readily in either direction. Versatile men are exposed to both risk profiles, and sides are not exempt from STI risk through oral sex and other contact.

This is exactly why it matters to be open with your sexual health clinician about your positioning preference. BASHH (the British Association for Sexual Health and HIV) recommends that asymptomatic sexually active MSM receive universal first-catch urine testing alongside pharyngeal (throat) and rectal swabs. If a clinician does not know you practise receptive anal sex, they may not offer a rectal swab — and a rectal gonorrhoea or chlamydia infection can be entirely asymptomatic and easily missed by a urine test alone.

The tools available to protect yourself are effective and, in the UK, largely free. PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) is available at no cost through NHS sexual health clinics for those who are HIV-negative and at risk of acquisition. The 2025 BASHH/BHIVA PrEP guidelines expanded access further, including updated event-based dosing options. When taken as prescribed, PrEP reduces the risk of HIV acquisition by over 99%. Condoms remain the most effective single barrier against most STIs. And for anyone living with HIV, the principle of U=U (Undetectable = Untransmittable) — endorsed by BHIVA, the Terrence Higgins Trust, and the NHS — confirms that a person on effective treatment with an undetectable viral load cannot transmit HIV sexually. Over 95% of people diagnosed with HIV in the UK are now on effective treatment and undetectable.

If you have questions about testing, PrEP, or any aspect of your sexual health, you can call the National Sexual Health Helpline free on 0300 123 7123 (Monday to Friday, 9am–8pm; Saturday and Sunday, 11am–4pm). For a broader list of UK resources, see our sexual health and support resources guide.

Do You Have to Pick a Label and Stick to It?

No. Across the research literature, the consistent finding is that sexual positioning identity among MSM is fluid rather than fixed. Men describe their preferences shifting as a result of personal growth, new partners, increased confidence, and simply trying something they had not considered before. Qualitative studies have also found that role preference can vary by partner type — some men describe topping with casual partners and bottoming in relationships, or vice versa.

Labels like “active,” “top,” “vers,” and “bottom” are best understood as useful shorthand for communication, not as an identity contract. They help you signal a preference on an app or during a brief verbal negotiation in a sauna. They do not define you, and there is no obligation to perform a role that does not feel right on any given occasion.

How to Communicate Your Preference in Practice

On apps such as Grindr, Scruff, and Recon, most profiles include a position field. Stating your preference plainly — “top,” “bottom,” “vers,” “side” — is standard and expected. If you are still exploring, “vers” or leaving the field blank are both perfectly reasonable.

In a sauna, verbal check-ins are normal. A simple “what are you into?” or “are you active or passive?” is a routine part of negotiation and is not considered intrusive. In fact, it is a sign of good sexual etiquette. If someone asks and you are unsure, saying “I’m still figuring that out” is a complete and valid answer. You can read more about navigating these conversations in our first-timer’s preparation guide.

At a sexual health clinic, being direct about your positioning preference ensures you receive the correct tests. There is no judgement — this is routine clinical information that helps your clinician look after you properly.

Common Misconceptions

There are several persistent myths worth addressing directly. The claim that “tops don’t need PrEP” is incorrect — insertive partners still acquire HIV, and PrEP is recommended for all MSM at risk, regardless of their usual role. The idea that your body type determines your role has no evidence behind it. The suggestion that you are “not really gay” if you only top conflates positioning with orientation, which are entirely separate things. The belief that “versatile” means having no preference is also misleading — many versatile men have a clear leaning but are comfortable in both roles. And the dismissal of sides as “just afraid of anal sex” mischaracterises a legitimate and stable sexual preference.

Understanding what “active” means is, ultimately, about understanding a piece of language — and the broader culture of communication, consent, and self-knowledge that surrounds it. The label is a starting point for conversation, not the final word on who you are.

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This guide is part of the Gaysaunas.co.uk Core Guides series. For information on preparing for a visit, see our first-timer’s preparation guide. For guidance on consent and social etiquette, see our etiquette and consent guide.